Writing dialogue

Funny when you have conversations with yourself. I'm working on Erosion now, and it's great, I'm on a roll with chalets collapsing, ground falling away, the shock and devastation.
And then I paused, listening to the characters' words as I was reading them aloud. I imagined I was at the Writers' group and someone said, '....I don't agree with their views.'
And I said, 'Well, they're not you. They don't live in Chorlton, they weren't teachers at universities, they don't quaff wine and go to writers' groups...' and then I started crying.
Someone asked if they were based on people I knew. Not exactly. Definitely not exactly, but they're based on people I've known but only in a hazy estimation (that's not a cop out) and these people with this other way of thinking and living in a world that no longer exists are all dead. And it upset me. And then I realised why these characters have these views. I want the people I knew to be heard. I just want them to be heard. That's all.

Writing again.

I've been working on Leaving Coty again today after nearly three weeks of sewing costumes, rehearsing, Easter holiday visits, family stuff and sewing costumes for last Thursday's show at the RNCM.
Monday. Don't know how I feel. Restless. The writing has gone amazingly well considering the break. I started with typing up some changes, printing up what I had so I could read without a mess of crossings out and little stars and inserts etc. And I'm further on with the book than I thought. Hooray! Tomorrow I will be less distracted, less likely to check facebook and flickr and Youtube for photos and comments on the gig. Less likely to sit dreaming. Less likely to think if I have my life in order. I know I haven't.
But I do know I have to finish Leaving Coty soon. Very soon. I hope I've got the passion in there whilst reining it back, I hope I've said all I want to say. I hope. In fact, forget that. I'm not hoping, I'm working on it. Tessa is so far from getting things right. She's trying hard, wading in the mud, only realising near the end of the book that we think the world is full of what we want when in fact, it isn't full at all, it's only full if we say 'yes' to opportunities. If we let them go, the world is empty, but if we do take them, then yes, then it is full. Does that make sense? Or too cryptic?
It's simple in some ways for her. She is catholic, she follows certain rules and she believes in second chances. Not everyone does though. I'm trying to be honest in what happens. I like her very much. I feel for all of the characters. Environment can screw us all up and for that we can only look on at what people do.
I loved dancing last Thursday. I love dancing. But I'm so glad to have my writing.
Must find some pictures to show you...