The Miracle Worker clip

Doing the 'Right' Thing

'The Bridges of Madison County' was on the TV late last night. I started watching it, I'd seen it years before, and had to watch until the end even though I knew what happened.

It's the dilemma. What do you do? Like Elsa in Casablanca, she wanted to stay with Rick, but is married to someone who needs her and who inspires others. To continue with this, he needs Elsa. Rick tells her to go. She doesn't want to, but she knows the 'right' thing to do is go with her husband.

In 'The Bridges of Madison County' we see Clint Eastwood outside those long, wooden American bridges photographing them. We see Meryl Streep inside, walking along, peering out.

This is the visual hint. He is free to roam and she is trapped by circumstances and convention.

They love each other. He tells her that 'this kind of certainty comes once in a lifetime.'

He tells her that observing animals in Africa he saw that there is no imposed morality, it's just the way it is. This reminds me of the female character in 'The Lost Steps.' The male protagonist comes from the 'civilised' world which makes him feel that loving someone isn't enough. He goes back home and realises that that is all that really matters.

Maybe we realise this too late in life. For the lucky ones, who we, seeking success in our careers, wherever, gently ridicule, they realise early on that this is all that is important. Our 'society' does not value this as highly as it deserves if it truly only comes once in a lifetime.

But then there is duty. For Meryl Streep's character it is duty to her husband, children and maintaining that security and way of life so that their lives aren't wrecked.
She would be selfish to leave and risk destroying this stable life that will make them stable adults, wouldn't she?

They last see each other in town, waiting at the traffic lights, in the pouring rain, he in his pickup truck and she sitting beside her husband in their truck which is behind his. He hangs a cross on his rear view mirror, she watches from behind, her hand on the door handle. The traffic lights change to green. He doesn't pull away...

Does she make the 'right' choice?

Somewhere On The Way

A friend sent this to me and it seems appropriate:

Somewhere On The Way

I wanted to say a lot of things:
I wanted to say how often lately
Your bright image has wandered through
The dark rooms of my mind:
I wanted to say how good it is
To wake up every morning
Knowing that the day contains
Something that is you.

I wanted to say a lot of things:
I wanted to talk about
The changing colour of moments,
The silent secret language
Of bodies making love.
I wanted to say that you
Are always only as far from me
As thoughts are from thinking.

I wanted to say I love you
In fourteen foreign languages
But most of all (most
Difficult of all) in English.

I wanted to say a lot of things.
But they all seem to have lost themselves
Somewhere on the way. And now I'm here
There's nothing I can say except
Hello, and Yes, I'd like some coffee, and
What shall we find to talk about
Before the night burns out?

(Peter Roche)

New Year's Thoughts

These are five top regrets of those who are dying, but they are applicable at any stage of our life, the earlier the better:

1) Have the courage to live the life I want to live, not the one others want me to live.
2) Make time for friends.
3) Work less so that I don't miss out on time with loved ones.
4) Let myself be happy. It is a choice.
5) Have the courage to express my feeling.