Poetry

Sometimes someone else's words say what's in our mind. This is from Mary Oliver's 'Dogfish.'

'I wanted the past to go away,
I wanted
to leave it, like another country; I wanted
my life to close, and open
like a hinge, like a wing, like
the part of the song
where it falls
down over the rocks: an explosion,
a discovery;
I wanted
to hurry into the work of my life;
I wanted to know,
whoever I was, I was

alive
for a little while.'

Moving On

I've realised this is definitely grieving. Last year I met someone who I thought was a certain type of person and then it came to light that they weren't that personality; they were someone else. And that's fine, they're still a great person, just I have no connection with them. I would love them to be who I at first thought, but that's not the reality, so I'm grieving for someone who never was. And it's time now; time to put that image away and get on with real life.

Ramblings

The Wharfedale Newspaper group have been in touch. They're going to do a covering piece on Erosion this or next week. The thing is, I've received a copy of Erosion and I'm making so many changes. I can't believe it. How many times have I edited? And it's on Amazon as an e-book. This is unprofessional. I thought it was ready. This is my syndrome. I grow impatient. And I rush.
This copy makes it easier to spot errors though. Will definitely do this in future. A computer screen isn't the same at all. And nor is printed up pages for some reason. The book is the thing!

It's drizzling. Everyone is still asleep. Could they sleep all day? Twenty-four hours and then I retain the peace of the house?

I'm edgy. Dis-satisfied, not content, frustrated. Need to fly away.

Erosion and reviews

Oh and did an interview with Whitby Gazette about 'Erosion.' Hard copy out soon, they'll be reviewing it and are running a competition to win copies. And the sun shone! And now it's this week...

'That is what learning is. You suddenly understand something you've understood all your life, but in a new way.' (Doris Lessing)

Biodanza

Every time Biodanza surprises me. Today started out playful and turned into sensual. All to various styles of music.
Having fun, being playful, laughing without self-consciousness or judgement. Lying on the floor stretching and contracting which was so, so erotic. And connecting with others as a group and singularly and then dancing or moving on your own again. Making eye contact, hand contact, complete embraces.

And it all feels so right. Every since The Tribe of Doris last year, all sorts of things are coming together. And it comes down to how to live our lives. The mist is clearing, I'm learning what I need, my body needs and so my spirit.

Thank you to Antoinette Lorraine from the Bristol School of Biodanza for these few wondrous hours to integrate with myself and with others and with my place in the cosmos. And thank you to Maria Canizalez Jerez from Manchester for making it possible.
Next one 21st of April, 1pm-5pm, The Yoga Rooms, 483a Barlow Moor Road, Chorlton-Cum-Hardy, Manchester M21 8AG

Erosion Cover

Erosion on Kindle

Uploaded Erosion (novel) a few minutes ago onto Amazon Kindle. Excited and nervous as the formatting seems intangible until it actually appears. Will it have worked successfully, will it look as I hope it will? I don't have a kindle so haven't a clue how it will look.
And pricing it!! Not like pricing a book. A hard copy of all my work.I looked at a few on line, thought, well, mine's not a best seller...so went for mid-range. Strange, £2.70...the price of a book? How on earth does anyone make a living? Write lots of books and get film rights. And a proper job.

So. Erosion, you've heard me speak about it before, but here is the synopsis as it will appear:

During her first storm swept night in a run-down chalet park on the North Yorkshire coast, a terrified Lizzie Juniper witnesses a building's rumbling collapse into the sea. Unable to save its inhabitants, she watches in horror as an old couple and their teetering home crash into the pounding waves hundreds of feet below.

The next day, the few remaining residents are given seven days to vacate their chalets yet it seems strange they are in no rush to leave...

Lizzie soon finds out there are worse things than an eroding coastline and that everyone has a choice about their future and when you have nothing left to lose, that choice can be surprisingly liberating.

November 5th approaches with a run of unusually warm days. A firework display is poised to ignite, a smuggler's tunnel is reopened and Lizzie discovers no-one is as they at first seem.

Erosion is about more than a subsiding cliff face; it is about the disappearance of a way of life and the discovery that people living on the edge can make extraordinary choices.

Phew. Breathe.

More JW and childhood

I read a few chapters of Jeanette Winterson's book last night and a few this morning. It's not an autobiography as such, it feels like her thoughts mingled with fiction with fact and you can hear her saying it aloud. This is why I like it so much. And it reminds me of things, things that I knew but were not said, or thought clearly. Some people at her reading said how she inspired them, (young women from Accrington and others) how she resonated with them, how she made them laugh and think. All these things.
Reading her book from her comments reminds me why I too used to read so much. It isn't to lose yourself, it is to find.
There is a coldness to a childhood in the north of England, was, physically due to lack of heating and the weather. There was warmth, a lot of warmth, I had a very happy childhood, but at the edges there is a coldness. Parents weren't involved, children had their own world, there was a difference that now blends between children and parents. If you're lucky.
But we found out on our own. And I read. It's good to be reminded.